Best Journey Through Mystery

I'm taking a 24 hr. Take-Home Final Examination in Evidence right now. Yes, as I type, I am taking a test. Sort of. With 13 hours left to go on the test, I am officially "done" and by "done" I mean I that tomorrow morning I'm rewriting this one paragraph and going over the thing for any hellish errors. Otherwise, my scholarly education in the field of Evidence is through.

Let me walk you through all the things that a 24 hr. Take-Home Can Be:

10:00 AM: I decide that, instead of starting the test right away (which I could take at any time, but I've already decided Thursday is all about the Evidence)I should go across the street for breakfast. A nice, big breakfast at the diner with a newspaper, too. I really want pancakes. And sausage. I get to the diner, and soon my hunger for pancakes and sausage swells up into hunger for the "Lumberjack Breakfast." So there I am, working at a great big pile of eggs, meats, and pancakes for a pretty long time.

12:02PM: That's the time my computer tells me that I officially started working on my final. There were lots of things to read ahead of time, and my internet stopped working for a little bit. (You see, I had to use the internet to download the test, and that starts the 24-hr ticker.)

12:42PM: I'm getting the hang of the fact pattern and then all of a sudden, BAM! My lumberjack breakfast hits me. I can't keep my eyes open. I roll over and sleep, for a little bit. (Yes, "roll over", that means I was doing my test while lying on my bed.

1:11ishPM: I'm awake, I start with my answers, but I'm just not feelin' it. My apartment just isn't the place. I better go to school. Yes, it was my option to take the test home, and now I'm taking it back to school.

1:30PM: Run into Bryant, Nate, and Ajay. They're on their way home from celebrating finishing their Tax Final with some Johnny Rockets. That's how you celebrate finishing law school finals. I find myself talking to Ajay for a while, a good while, and then I head to school. For real.

2:00PM: Now I'm at school. And I have to check my email, and maybe read the news a bit, and play a little RocketMania, but then I really start. I really, really start being an Evidence genius, hardcore.

Okay I'll admit that "being an Evidence genius, hardcore" doesn't prohibit numerous bathroom breaks and several additional games of RocketMania.

6:00PM: Starting to get hungry, starting to get tired of writing . . . but if I just answer three more questions, then I'll be done with the biggest part of the test, just hang in there, man.

7:00PM: Done! (With the big part.) I can't believe it. I made myself sit down and do it, and I did it. I run out for a quick bite, and a little re-energizing. Maybe I'll go to the Dumpling House on Eldridge.

9:45PM: Crap. Right after I left school I got a call from a friend in the neighborhood and we decided to meet up for a little grub at this Indian Place and no joke it took an hour for our food to arrive. And an hour to eat it. And we had to walk down some neat West Village streets, too. But now, now I am back to school. So glad that I just have the little part left.

10:45PM: And the little part is done. With time to spare. But now I'm just repeating what I said in the top paragraph.

So, yeah, sorry. That's all you're getting from Steady Mobbin' today, a rundown on the first 11 or so hours of my 24 hour take home final. Yes, the numbers might not add up right, but I am certain that this thing has to be turned in by 12:02 tomorrow. That much I know is true.